Love Is More of an Action not a Feeling?

Do you think perhaps that love is a verb not a state of being? A lot of people say love comes and goes in a marriage, but is that just the passion of the relationship? Perhaps that feeling of love is connected with our actions?





I ask this because I was told an interesting story the other day.....





A women goes to her friend the who happens to be a lawyer. She tells him she wants to get a divorce but she wants to hurt her husband as much as possible before she does. The man tells here ok here's what you do. Go back to your house and act like you love him. Make him his favorite dinners, get him a beer without asking, give him random kisses, and tell him you love him everyday. Do that for about a month and then just randomly tell him you want a divorce. It'll crush him. The woman agrees and they go their seperate ways.





Three months goes by and the lawyer gets no word. He gives the woman a call and asks her about the divorce. She asks "What divorce? I love him!"





truth?

Love Is More of an Action not a Feeling?
Yes! "Agape" it is a selfless love that ACTS and seeks not its own in return.





There are three other kinds of love:





"Storge" --- An affectionate kind of love. A love often times taken for granted as is common among family members. A mother and son for example.





" Philia" -- A friendship kind of love





"Eros" ---which is a romantic sort of love intense fatuation that may or may not include physical relations.





**************************************...





Billy Graham said:


"enuine love is not (or should not be) based on feelings...The question is are you willing to love…"





C. S. Lewis:


"love, in the Christian sense, does not mean an emotion. It is a state not of the feelings but of the will…"





Amy Carmichael writes:


"Lord, give me love, then I have all,


For love casts out tormenting fear,


And love sounds forth a trumpet call


To valiant hope, sweet and clear.


The birds of joy sing in my tree,


Love of my heart, when I have Thee."
Reply:Yes true. love is a decision.
Reply:Yeah I believe love is an act of choice. You can either love or not. Interestingly enough though the feeling is that we desire to have someone love us. So a choice causes a feeling in the other person which often promotes them make a similar choice. It's the cycle of a healthy loving relationship; but it also works in the opposite direction. Sometimes a failing marriage only needs one of the two partners to make a decision to love the other.
Reply:Love is not an emotion because Love does not come and go. Love is always there, it is just us who turn away (from God and man). Love is not a chemical reaction for it is a quality. There is no measurment to love. If one is saying love is merely biological, it would mean love is quantifiable. So, to risk receiving absurd answers, I ask what is the amount of chemicals needed for love to be in our bodies? A gallon? A liter?


The person who answered the question that love is a decision is correct. For love is eternal and always present because the Eternal One decided on us (creation) and that decision has never been revoked. The clearest demonstration of love being a decision is in Christ Jesus. He prayed in the garden, "Father, take this cup (His eminent suffering) away from me, but not as I will, but as You will." So, in fact His humanity was afraid to die so horribly, His humanity asked to be saved from it, but His humanity "decided" to carry on with the salvific mission of the Father no matter His emotions and no amount of endorphins or adrenalin from His fears would change His "decision". So, once again love is not an emotion nor a chemical reaction.


Motherhood is another fine example, a mother is awakened at 3 a.m. by her newborn child. The child needs a diaper change. The mother is upset and tired because peaceful sleep has been broken, but despite her fatigue and emotions she "decides" to change the child's diapers. So, once again love is not an emotion nor a chemical reaction.


May the Lord bless and keep you. May He let the light of His face shine upon you.


God's and your beast of burden


Fr. john
Reply:nope, love is a feeling and a result of chemical interactions within the brain. It's a lovely feeling though.