For the past 5 years I have been in dramatic/emoitionally abusing relationships. I'm 24. I finally decided to let go of one of the assholes about a year ago and 6 months later my neighbour asked me out on a date. He just moved in across the street (on the lake) and was single. I had been single and i thought that that was enough time to grieve over my abusive one.
Anyways, here we are 5 months down the line and we have been inceperable. I have moved in, we are very attracted to one another, he is extremely caring, very trustworthy, just a great person all in all.
So what I am asking is "is a love that is based on drama stronger/feel stronger than a normal everyday love. There are so many things that are different in this relationship and I feel like i dont love him but I LOVE doing nice things for him and making him happy. I am also not jealous which leads me to believe that I dont love him anymore and it was only infatution :(
How can I tell if this is real love or not?
Drama love vs. Normal Love?!?!?!?!?
Dramatic relationships seem more exciting but for every good point there is also a really bad point. Love like that cannot last forever. Love that is based on mutual attraction, common interests, and trust is the only way to go. There is less excitement but no one gets broken bones either so look for the good and forget the bad.
5 month is kind of quick for moving in together, so love may fade away. Be sure to pay your fair share of expenses and keep an emergency cash reserve to give you a sense of fairness and security. If you let him pay all the bills then maybe you have lost a bit of respect for him. We are rarely attracted to people that we see as "weak".
There is an exercise that I find to be very nice for building intimate connection: Touch. Learn your partner's whole body by exploring it with your skin. Feel the difference between touching with your hands and touching with the backs of your arms or your feet. Look up Tantra for more ideas on this.
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