Is to love an act of Will or not?

I mean here the love to a person or child. Can we through an act of Will access this love or is love automatically there?


For example, although I know I love my son, there might be times that I have to remind myself and get in touch with my love to him again. For example if I am very busy with work.


So is to love also an act of Will. Can we get away from love if we concentrate on other things instead on this love? How could this be in relationship situations?





Just curious what your thoughts could be about that.

Is to love an act of Will or not?
Yes and yes... you demonstrate both will and fate in your love... as far as maternal/paternal love is concerned I think that the most interesting perspective I have ever encountered is from All the Kings Men by Robert Penn Warren. It suggests that this type of love is another manifistation of the same impulse that allows people to justify (to themselves) abusing their own children. He suggests that a parent knows that he gave a piece of himself in creating that child and that s/he spends the rest of his life trying to get back that piece of himself... actually applied to real life situations, I think that this phylosophy makes perfect sense.





I also think that there are people you can't help but loving... Every year, I do Vacation Bible School, and there is one or two kids out of several hundred that stand out from the rest of them as delightful children... kids who can make a request and every other person there is willing to bend over backwards to accomodate them.... I think that the act of Will in regard to love occurs when you chose to love someone that is not someone that you would have a natural inclination to love... other than this, I think that most of what we call 'love' is a circumstanctial form of affection given to certain individuals based on elements beyond the control of all individuals whether it is relation by birth, natural beauty, or a sprightly (or subdued) personality...





In the course of daily living, I think that most of the choice involved in love is whether or not the love that inherently exists will be demonstrated or not...
Reply:To fall in love is the will of the God I serve. To remain in love is a choice.
Reply:Love is better to feel and experience than to analyze. Analysis has many useful purposes, but it takes you away from love.
Reply:I think you answered your own question. When you're busy at work....or, it could be anything else you're focused on. If you know you love your son, you don't have to access it all the time, do you? Your love doesn't "go away" when you're concentrating on something else. If, on the other hand, you feel out of touch for extended periods of time, that's another thing entirely. I didn't "read" that in your question. No, I don't think love is an act of will in any relationship. It's there or it isn't. %26amp; if it is there--you'll feel it when you're not busy with something else.
Reply:If feel that love itself is an impulse. It is a state where we tend to hold the wellbeing of another human being may that be a child, lover, sibling or friend over our own. Love is intrinsically irrational like faith so it cannot be an act of will. It is this selfless nature of love that is a common bond between all human cultures across the world.


A display of affection is an affirmation of the feeling of love. But the show of affection in itself is not a display of love. Human beings as we know are capable of pretending genuine affection when no real love exists. Sometimes our lives are so truly mixed up that we cannot distinguish true love from shows of affection. If often takes a crisis for a person's true feelings to be revealed.


Thus all I can say is that you do love your child but fear that your inability to show affection often enough may be construed as lack of love.


And with children it is necessary to show affection often enough to reassure them that you do actually love them though with older people more subtle signs may work.


A friend of mine grew up thinking that her mother never really loved her as mother had never given her enough obvious indications of her love. Yet when a true crisis confronted my friend her mother showed up and was there for her. A turning point that made my friend realize that her mother had always loved her but had no idea how to show her affection. Today mother and daughter are closer than they have ever been in their lives.





To conclude I would like to say that love itself is not an act of will. How you choose to show or hide your love is an act of will.
Reply:The act of falling in love or of feeling the maternal bond of love I don't believe to be an act of will.





To maintain these bonds does require the act of active will. It's what makes it so important in our lives.





When you have to pull from deep within yourself for the strength and determination to keep on the path which will lead back to that feeling of love with your son you are growing within and you are teaching him valuable lessons for his future.





Love is not all roses. And because we care so much for those we love the difficult times can be truly DIFFICULT! But when we emerge, we feel so much more capable and strong.